WHAT MEN & WOMEN MUST KNOW ABOUT MARRIAGE
“And the Lord God said, it is not good that the man should be alone: I will make an help meet for him”
FACT NO.1: MARRIAGE IS A UNIVERSITY
You must know that marriage is a university where you enroll to learn but you cannot graduate. Right from courtship period, you start learning a lot of things about human beings, relationship management, money management, in-law management, psychology of your spouse, do’s and don’ts of your spouse, factors that make marriages to succeed, child bearing, child training, tolerance, forgiveness, sex and sexuality, etc. If you go into any marriage and you fail to learn in a simple way, by the time you finally enter into it, you may learn in a hard way. So, if you are still single, you should start learning. Once you are married, you must continue to learn. Learn from the mistakes of others. Learn from your own mistakes. If you make mistakes, be humble and learn so that you don’t make the same mistake again.
FACT NO.2: THE WAY TO A MAN’S HEART
Some people posit that the way to a man’s heart is FOOD. That is quite correct. As a woman, you must know that men love to eat good and delicious food. If you want to marry, as a woman, you must know how to cook all kinds of foods that your husband likes. However, if you must marry from another tribe, you need to learn how to cook their traditional food to a certain extent. For instance, if you are a Yoruba woman and you want to marry an Igbo man, certainly, you must learn how to cook some of the local foods. Igbo have plenty types of native soups in Nigeria. Also, if you want to cook for your husband, make sure you cook what he will like to eat and never force him to eat just any food. Some foolish women prepare foods for their husbands based on what their children want to eat. For instance, if a child wants to eat noodles, the woman will go and prepare noodles for the family without even consulting the man. That is madness. If you are serving your husband, make sure the food is hot and present it in a clean plate and tray. Some careless wives serve food with dirty plates. Some wives serve their husbands cold foods. Some women don’t even have time to prepare foods for their husbands. Some women prepare food very late for their husbands. Some wives encourage their husbands to eat outside and lot more. These are common mistakes women should avoid in a marriage. Many men have gone back to their ex or side chicks simply because of the manner in which their wives handle the food at home. Men don’t joke with food.
FACT NO.3: SEX IS IMPORTANT
Another school of thought asserts that the way to a man’s heart is sex. A woman who wants to marry should know that an average man loves sex. Over 95% of men love sex. When I say men love sex, I mean, men don’t joke with sex. God permits sex only in a marriage. So, as a woman, if you want to have a happy home, you must be ready at all times to respond to your husband’s sexual demands. In reality, many men tend to have sex regularly at the initial stage of their marriage. Some men prefer to have sex during the night. Some prefer it anytime they have the urge. There are men that can never be satisfied by their wives sexually. Those are men who need serious deliverance. So, as a woman, you must know that men love sex so much. If you decide to deny your husband sex habitually, he may look for it elsewhere and there are woman and young girls who are ready to grab him from you. The fact remains that good sexual satisfactions cements a good marriage. Sex denial or sex starvation will scatter a marriage. Even if you don’t love sex and your partner loves it, you must adjust and cope with him or her. Creativity is important for sexual pleasure in a marriage. Couples should create diverse kinds of sexual styles in order not to make it monotonous. Having timetable for sex is bad. Some people recommend timetable. If you use a timetable for sex in your marriage but if one of you is sick or depressed when it is time to do it, what will happen? Also, if one of you develops sexual urge outside the timetable, what happens? Wisdom is needed please. Men should also have understanding heart not to be harassing their wives sexually at all times. There must be mutual understanding. Love making in marriage is good but moderation must be applied to it.
Beloved, on account of time constraints, we shall continue later in the second edition. The fact remains that there are millions of things we need to learn for marriage to succeed.
Watch out for part 2 of this message. You are free to share this with others if you want.
Yours in the school of marital success.
Evang. Johnson Ojo
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