Should I Obey My Fiance’s Parents On This Issue?
Kindly keep me anonymous
Our wedding is in four months. Last weekend my fiance and I visited his parents (not for the first time) but as part of the ongoing preparation.
During the discussion, his mum asked him a question which obviously was out of what we were discussing in their dialect “bawo, so ti de be?” and he replied with “rara o” and the woman asked again in a thought-provoking manner “Kilode?”
At first, I didn’t understand what was going on until later that day.
But I noticed my fiance’s countenance instantly changed.
When we got to his apartment that day before going back home, I asked him to tell me the meaning of what his mother said to him which suddenly changed his mood. At first, he felt reluctant to share with me but he later opened up.
He said his mother asked him if we have had sex and not just sex if I am pregnant.
I couldn’t believe my ears as my mouth refused to close.
I asked him why his mum will want us to do such a thing. He then told me that that is the practice from his place. He said the wife to be must be pregnant before the family will give their full support and allow her to marry their son.
He never shares this with me before this time.
Our wedding is been announce almost every week in our church.
How can I share this with my parents?
What will be our pastor’s reaction?
I am confused about what to do now. A friend I shared with said, I and my fiance should do it, but we should make sure it is two to a month before our wedding so that no one will notice the pregnancy. She said I should do this to save the shame that we follow if we eventually cancel the wedding.
Before I forget, my fiance said that is the only thing to do. He said he can’t afford to miss the blessing of his parents and also disrespect their aged tradition.
Please, what should I do? I am confused and dying silently
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