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Home Forums Women Issues I AM TIRED OF HER CHANGING LIKE CAMELON IN A MARRIAGE OF JUST 3 YEARS.

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  • #7738
    feranmi
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    frustrated irritated black man shaking his head directly at camera |  ClipStock

    I know it might seem too early to start nursing this feeling but each day the signs keep coming.

    I dated my wife for like 3 years before we marry. All this time she stays in another city with her family while I based in another city but she does visits like twice each year.
    While we were dating there is so many things that I saw in her or will I say she made me saw her that am not seeing again.

    One, am this guy that loves to help. Like, am this type that has this dreams of helping the whole world(women and kids) if it is possible. While we are dating she made me see her like like mind, she shares her dreams two of running NGOs for women and children, adopt and train orphans e.t.c. but to my greatest surprise now she is very very opposite. Most annoying is her dislike for kids coming close.
    We share dreams of having a large house with families always around but now she kicks against every idea of anybody coming around, her family included.

    Two, She made me see her as this ambitious and industrious lady, running a couple of businesses then.
    I remember having a fight with her because I said she will finish giving birth before talking about business or work when we marry. To my greatest surprise now that we are finally married she doesn’t have this push nor the zeal to do anything, in fact, she kills every move to started up something for her.
    In less than 18months of our marriage I have started two businesses for her she runs it down.
    In fact, the first business I proposed to her never even start, I gave
    her money to buy her machines, she doesn’t buy them and money I didn’t see.
    Her excuse was that she is not interested in what she was doing before that she wants to go into business.

    Late last year I started for her another business myself, order the goods myself. That business did not see 31 December 2020.
    Is so painful because I planned of starting a couple of businesses with her help and to be in her care in 2 or 3 years so that I can resign from my work and come back home fully (My work take me away for the most part of the year), but it seems I didn’t watch before jumping into this relationship considering all these dramas am seeing presently.

    Right now am in the middle of the road not knowing what to do.
    I don’t know if these are signs of laziness/her style, fear of failing or just that she needs time.

    Three, Sex life. She is totally a different person now like it is just too boring to make love to her now unlike before.
    I have discussed it with her to know what changed she said nothing. Though she seems happy in and out because I make sure I treat her like a queen even though am just trying to survive
    It doesn’t look like she is lacking anything or not happy with the marriage
    Less than 18 months into the marriage making love to her is just for purpose of procreation.

    Last but not the least her money management is scary.
    You give her money to keep next time you ask about the money she can’t give a breakdown of the money nor point what she did with it.
    I don’t know what to think, though I trust her very much.
    But my confusion now is I came across two transfers she made to this particular guy in just Feb while trying to use her phone.
    I check her call log and notice that she is in constant communication with this guy. I check out the number on my WhatsApp and Facebook.
    It happens that this guy, which she saved with one funny name on her phone, is a guy I knew his name because it always comes up. In fact in one of her visits while we are dating one day she spent close to 1hour plus with this guy on phone with me right there, I confronted her she told me that the guy is her ex-friend but her good friend and colleague and that he is married with kids.
    I don’t know if it is a good idea to confront her again with the alert and constant communications with this guy or lay low, play along and monitor things.

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    • #7777
      blossy
      Participant

      I Suspect she married you in pretence

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