How To Deal with 5 Silent Issues that Ruin Marriage
There is no gainsaying in the fact that in marriage, there will be a time when you will have a misunderstanding with your spouse. However, It will only show how mature are you in the way and manner you will resolve the conflict.
Have you ever wondered why intimacy diminishes in marriages over years? There are so many reasons why partners stop connecting and shy away from sexual intimacy and intercourse. Aside from biological or medical reasons that would inhibit a person’s ability to have sex, the following are the 5 most common silent issues that can get intimacy out of marriage:
Relationship issues and unresolved resentment
Some couples struggle with recovering after a fight, or find they are on opposite ends when it comes to some major issues facing the relationship. Also, the couple could be recovering from emotional injuries such as affairs, or breaches of trust that bring about keeping score, resentment and unresolved hurt. These couples are likely to avoid their partner.
Couples may not be getting the sex they want or like, have gotten bored with the routine, or there are larger sexual issues around desire and dysfunction that they don’t know how to talk about or where to begin. They often say, “I don’t want to hurt my partner’s feelings” and these couples tend to avoid conflict, so they back away from sexual intercourse.
Stress and fatigue
Parenthood, chronic illness, pressures at work, finances, caring for a family member or other life issues are just a few causes of stress and fatigue. Being in this state of mind wreaks havoc on your sleep, can cause irritability, depression, and substantially diminishes sexual desire. Many anti-anxiety and depression medications meant to help couples tackle day to day life also adversely affect sex drive and arousal.
Body image issues
Many people suffer from body image issues and shame around not having “the perfect body and are preoccupied with trying to hide, or avoid what they perceive as turning their partner off. Because they haven’t fully embraced and love their body, it’s hard for people in this state to feel that someone desires them, or difficult to stay present at the moment during lovemaking. This prevents couples from being intimate as the person with body issues will often turn down their partner’s sexual advances.
Performance anxiety/discomfort during sex
For men, performance anxiety, whether it pertains to getting or maintaining an erection, or being able to last as long as he or his partner would like, may cause anxiety, disappointment and shame. For women, this could manifest into not being able to or pressure to orgasm, or painful or uncomfortable sexual intercourse. For both, feelings of inadequacy, or feeling like they cannot satisfy their partner often comes up and many couples choose to avoid sex altogether, because they perceive that this problem will never change, or have difficulty voicing their concerns, and talking about their feelings
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